When my friend Emma’s 11-year-old daughter came home from school crying, Emma had no idea what was wrong. After locking herself in the bathroom for 15 minutes, her daughter finally whispered, “Mom, I’m bleeding.”
Emma froze — she realized this was her daughter’s first period, and she had never talked to her about it.
For many moms, this moment comes unexpectedly. But how a mother reacts will shape how her daughter feels about her body and womanhood.
Here’s what wise moms do — the three things to say and three things to avoid when your daughter gets her first period.
Three Things Wise Moms Say
1. “Congratulations — you’re growing up!”
This is the first thing every girl needs to hear. A first period isn’t something to fear — it’s a natural milestone showing her body is healthy and maturing.
By celebrating instead of panicking, moms help daughters feel proud instead of embarrassed.
2. “You should learn to protect yourself.”
Explain gently that menstruation means her body is becoming capable of reproduction. This doesn’t mean she’s “an adult” yet, but it’s time to understand boundaries, safety, and self-respect.
Encourage open conversations about body changes, friendships, and self-protection.
3. “Remember to stay clean and take care of yourself.”
Teach her how to use sanitary pads, wash hands before and after changing, and keep underwear clean. Avoid using cold water or sitting in wet clothes — good hygiene keeps infections away.
Three Things She Shouldn’t Do
1. Don’t Let Her Catch a Cold
During her period, a girl’s body is more sensitive. Wearing short skirts or crop tops might make her look stylish, but staying warm prevents cramps and discomfort.
2. Avoid Cold or Spicy Foods
Cold drinks, ice cream, and spicy snacks can cause uterine spasms or worsen cramps. Instead, offer warm soups, water, and light meals.
3. Don’t Do Intense Exercise
Even if she feels fine, heavy activity like running or jumping can increase bleeding or pain. Light stretching or walking is best.
Wise Moms Talk Early
Most girls start menstruating between ages 10 and 16. Talking about it before it happens can make a huge difference.
If her period starts before age 10, it might signal early puberty. If it hasn’t started by 16, see a doctor.
“When we talk about it early, our daughters grow up with knowledge, not fear.”
FAQ
Q1: What age should I talk to my daughter about periods?
Around 9 or 10 is ideal. Use age-appropriate language or children’s books to explain what menstruation means.
Q2: What if her period is irregular at first?
That’s completely normal. Cycles often take 1–2 years to become regular. If bleeding is very heavy or lasts over 7 days, consult a doctor.
Q3: Can she shower during her period?
Yes! Warm showers help with relaxation and hygiene — just avoid cold water.
Q4: What if she feels embarrassed or scared?
Listen first. Reassure her that every woman experiences this, and it’s a sign her body is healthy and strong.
